More!

Dear bagel patrons,

Yet again your humble, and irritated, female bagel mongers have few things to inform you of.

The special on the board called a Canadian, is so named because it is chalk full of Canadian bacon goodness! We ask you don't mess with the specials. We ask that you do not demand we make you a Canadian without the bacon. That's just stupid.
We also ask you don't demand two of these monstrous, baconless, Canadians.
Oh and, your friend who orders a Egg/chedder on a bagel and demands we scrape the grill so she doesn't get any meat juice on her egg? Is a fucking moron. America is the only place where vegetarians still eat eggs.
I know you three all think you're so cool and trendy and saving of the animals,but guess what? You're pretentious, annoying, have an entitlement problem and aren't doing shit to help the animals.
You want to help animals? Go donate to the local animal shelter instead of buying that two hundred dollar Christian Arguiler purse you're holding. Go volunteer at a rescue instead of having us make your stupid fucking sandwich four times because "ZOMG THEREZ MEATZ JOOOOSE ON THIZ!" you stupid poser bitches.
I know you think I am just uncaring and am just talking when I told you I thought you were bullshit lazy assholes who don't actually care about animals, but I do in fact, do allot with animals. I donate 100$ a month to the Arizona Humane Society, as does my bf, I volunteer at the local rescue, and I DEVOUR MEAT, everyday while I do it. You aren't even American vegetarian for a good reason, I know lots of veggies that don't bug me, you just want to feel cool.
You aren't.
Please go play in traffic.