Thankskilling

Yes, that's a real movie. Yes, it's about a homicidal turkey puppet. Yes, you should watch it post haste.

Thanksgiving this year was glorious and delightful as only Thanksgiving hosted in my living room can be. The Utah Escapees gathered together to feed on the flesh of dead animals and watch poorly animated cartoons and senseless tv shows whilst drinking so much beer and vodka that Beth ends up being thrown into the air repeatedly while screaming.

Yes, our band of friends that had managed to escape the hell hole of happy valley consisted of a porn star, the goth kids, a drunken hippy and the successful couple that only look normal. Frank and I retreated to his apartment to retrieve hookah coals at one point, and while there we realized it was of dire importance that he put on chain mail, knee high metal boots, spiked arm guards and gather up the drinking horn and his bass guitar. Some how we had another thirty pack of beer as well.

A man pushing a stroller came across us in my giant fur coat and his metal gear with beer, guitar and skateboard covered in Necronomicon designs and pink My Little Pony wheels. He took one look at us and said, 'You guys are having much more fun than I am tonight.' To which I say, Yes, we are. If you didn't have that screeching crotch dropping I would invite you to join our rowdy band of drunken time traveling vikings. But you have that thing and no one in our Escapists group likes those so we bid you farewell.
The rest of the night was much stomping, everyone wearing the metal gear, guitar and bass playing, watching Beavis and Butthead and Tim and Erics Awesome show. The massive Scythe Frank bought Kris for Christmas last year was busted out for more viking metal effect and the rabbit and cat were cuddled and fed and played with till they both passed out from exhaustion.

So much happened but my brain is running on Four hours of sleep and a full eight hours of being a bagel monger. I'm short circuiting. My body hurts from laughing so much last night. Haven't had a wonderful time like that in a very long time.

In parting I give you Frank filling the drinking horn with beer.